Daily Dose of M

Since I’ve begun writing again, I’ve realized that putting things down on paper (or screen) helps me appreciate the crazy a little more.  Parenting is hard stuff.  It is certainly not for the weak or faint of heart.  I’m convinced that my buttons are pushed more than an elevators! 

Being blessed enough to have a daughter and a son I’ve experienced quite an array of emotions. Now, I’m fully aware that all children are different, but for us, my girl is all sugar and drama and my boy is……..

EXHAUSTING!!!

I hope you enjoy as we bring you a little segment we call our Daily Dose of M.

For the past two weeks I’ve been looking for my iron.  I never use it (sorry Josh).  I dislike ironing with a passion and will always try to get away with using the wrinkle free setting on my dryer. However, little Miss G is in Girl Scouts and I have a stack of patches that need to be ironed on her Daisy tunic.  After relentlessly searching for that damn iron, I’ve decided it’s time to buy a new one.  This, of course, means that the second I open up the new iron I will find the old one.  Damn it.

M and I hop in the Mama wagon and head to Target.  The trip itself was pretty uneventful. M was a great helper, throwing every scary Halloween decoration he could in our cart. (Did I mention he’s only 3? Some of these decorations would give me nightmares! This kid has no fear.) Like any good parent, I lied and told him we’d get Halloween decorations next time.  We make our way to the check out with only the iron in the cart.  I deserve a huge pat on the back for that one!  While we are checking out M asks me if I can pick him up. Knowing that I won’t be able to pick him up much longer (the kid weighs 50 pounds already) I reach down and he jumps in my arms.  M gives me the biggest hug, pulls back, looks at me and tells me, “You’re the best mama ever!.”  At that moment, I couldn’t have been happier and thought to myself, maybe another wouldn’t be so bad. Within 2 seconds of thinking that Matthew touches a mole I have under my chin and shouts,

“MAMA, I’M TOUCHING YOUR NIPPLE!”

Great! My 3 year old is still calling my mole a nipple and this time he shouts it out for everyone at Target to hear.  I gently correct M and remind him that I have a mole there and that it is not a nipple.  He was very quick to exclaim, just as loudly,

“HAHAHA, BUT IT LOOKS AND FEELS JUST LIKE A NIPPLE.  HAHAHAHAHA!”

Sigh. 

You’re lucky you’re cute, kid. Excuse me while I make an appointment to get my mole removed.

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Just Laugh

Have you ever had one of those days where nothing is going the way you want? Where you can’t even sit down to enjoy a meal without wanting to pull your hair out?  Kids are hard. Some days are better than others, but the majority of the days I feel like I’m running a marathon with no end in sight.

Motherhood has been one of the most amazing experiences of my life, one that I wouldn’t change for the world. It is also an experience that has left me feeling bipolar daily! If anything, I’ve learned that sometimes you just have to laugh.

One Sunday after church, Josh and I decided to take the kids to brunch at our favorite restaurant.  We always have to mentally prepare ourselves because, let’s face it, eating out with a 3 and 6 year old is always an interesting experience.  We prepared ourselves for M standing in the booth, walking around the restaurant instead of sitting in his seat, and even G going up to the buffet 10 times, only eating a sliver of what’s on each plate.  What we weren’t prepared for was the hilarity of events that happened.

“Daddy, I need to use the bathroom. No, Dada, by myself you stay here.”  Okay, so my three year old is asserting some independence.  This is great!  Until he came out of the bathroom in front of the entire restaurant with his pants down. He just was letting it all hang out.  No shame! Let the parental fail tally begin!  Parental fail #1

After Josh ran to help M pull his pants up we then tried to hide our embarrassment, burying it in another mimosa.  (Did I mention they’re free and unlimited at Sunday brunch?) The kids were kind enough to give Josh and I about 3 minutes of uninterrupted, almost uneventful time.  Then, it happened.  M decided he’d debut his new song for the entire restaurant.  Of course, as a singer I was thrilled!  YAY! My children love music and now they want to perform in front of strangers! That’s amazing! Right?   Nope.  M’s song was entitled, “Spank my booty butt.”  He was so excited singing his new song that he also decided to create a dance acting out his song lyrics. Apparently, he wanted to really give his new song some life! Parental fail #2

So, here we are, onto mimosa number 4, watching our son spank his “booty butt” for his audience. I wish I could say that Josh and I just watched and enjoyed our son being his goofy self, but instead we sat (with our mimosas) too focused on our son not “behaving” in front of strangers, not enjoying him for who he is.

I decided to post about our exciting brunch, sharing details of our adventurous meal. As I was typing about M’s non existing pants and amazing song and dance moves I found myself laughing out loud in the middle of the restaurant. Something that I don’t do nearly enough. What was completely mortifying in the moment was hilarious once I gave myself the opportunity to just take it for what it is.  My children, loving life, being themselves, and just being happy.

I want to raise well-behaved children that turn into well mannered adults. I want to let my children be children, to play in the dirt, to be silly and goofy.  But where’s the middle ground?  How do I let them be themselves and also act appropriately?  I don’t believe there is the perfect answer to these questions.  All I can do is love them unconditionally, embrace their silly sides, and laugh while sipping my mimosa. 20170820_120706.jpg